A new year

It is crazy that 2010 is already over.   A year full of so many firsts without our son.  All what would have been his first holidays and then finally his first birthday.  I can not beleive how quickly this year has gone by.  They say time heals all wounds and although I don't find the tears coming as often I will forever have a void in my heart and miss my son.  It is a wound that will never heal and a void that will never be filled.  Something that only other moms in my situation can possibly understand.  I remember new years last year and how hard it was to say goodbye to 2009.  It was the year I found out I was pregnant with Elijah, had all the events of that pregnancy, spent 3 months in the hospital hooked up to monitors and doing everything I could to protect him, his birth, and then his passing.  All of those events in one year and then it was gone, just like that.  I can't beleive I am not a year out from all of that.  Some days I feel like it was just yesterday.  Other days I close my eyes and try to think about what it felt like to hold him because it feels so long ago.  Those feelings I am sure will never change.  So this year the new year was obviously different then last.  It just feels weird.  We moved this past year so that was something new.  I wonder what this new year will bring for us.  One thing will never change though, we will continue to miss and love Elijah more and more each day.